7 signs that you are a trustworthy person

Some individuals are incapable of saying “no,” even in situations in which their permission might cause them actual physical damage. One feels that the individual is either attempting to be helpful and handy to everyone around them or is terrified of upsetting the person. They can always be relied on; although their input is sometimes sought, it is seldom considered by anybody. Even if the individual in question first indicates that they will not comply with their request, they will very soon change their minds.

You are trustworthy and try to assist everyone else in your immediate environment. On the other hand, showing kindness and being disloyal are two very different things. A kind individual is always willing to provide a hand whenever they have the chance. A decent individual will stop all of their work and will complete all of the tasks that have been assigned to them.

If you have long felt irritated when someone asks you for help, but you find it hard to find the strength to refuse the person, check yourself on the following points. It may turn out that you don’t know how to set boundaries and say firmly “no.

1. You hide your dissatisfaction and irritation

Constant requests for help that you can’t refuse cause you to feel negative emotions. You get irritated, frustrated and even hurt but still remain silent. The explanation is extremely simple: if you allow yourself to vent your emotions, you will cease to be comfortable with those around you. You fight back, which means that you can offend someone, ruin relationships with people, get criticized, and so on.

You’re afraid of conflict and what it can bring you. So even when you realize that the person is getting cocky and you’re really starting to go against yourself, you’re not going to back down.

Another possible reason for your reluctance to express emotion is the belief that other people’s feelings are more valuable than your own. If you see that the person is relying on you, you will try your best to push aside all your business to give them the support they need and not upset them.

2. You think you are irreplaceable

You always think that if you deny a person a request, no one else will help them but you. But in most cases, this is not the case. Stop naively believing that you are irreplaceable in the lives of a huge number of people – relatives, colleagues, acquaintances. You are not the only option for them. Most likely, you’re just the most convenient; they turn to you because they know: you’ll agree to help.

Once you refuse a person’s request a few times, you’ll be surprised to find that they’ll find someone else to ask. So don’t keep dreaming that the people around you need you. Build personal boundaries and put your own needs and desires first.

3. You treat everyone the same

Everyone has a close circle of people for whom you can sometimes put your plans aside. Specially treating them is justified: they are just as willing to drop everything and run to your rescue when you need them. But if you treat everyone this way – your distant relatives, recent acquaintances, colleagues, and so on, you’re just someone who can’t find the strength to say a firm “no.”

It’s great if you try to treat people the way you’d like to be treated. But you have to realize a simple truth – unfortunately, it doesn’t work that way. So stop being overly involved, considerate and caring to everyone around you. People quickly get used to it and start demanding even more from you. It’s better to spend your resources on yourself and your loved ones.

4. You apologize all the time

If you can’t fulfil a person’s request for some reason, you start apologizing for it. You explain to him or her the reasons for your refusal, and in doing so, you feel guilty. You only provoke others to turn to you more often when you put yourself in this position. After all, it’s much more likely that your feelings of guilt will cause you to do whatever they ask next time.

5. You don’t ask for help in return

Yes, it is a paradox – if you do not know how to refuse requests from people around you, you are likely, you never try to ask anyone for help. It’s very simple: you don’t set and assert your boundaries because you don’t have confidence in yourself. You don’t see your worth, which is why you so easily agree to help, even if it ruins your plans or hurts you.

If you don’t feel your worth, your problems will seem too insignificant to you. You will be ashamed to bother other people to help you deal with your life. You deal with all difficulties yourself, and you most often refuse even when someone offers you help.

6. You do what is more convenient for others

If you are offered something, and you understand that it is not entirely convenient for you, you do not like the unfavourable conditions; you find the price for your work too low, you do not suit the time for which the meeting is scheduled, you still agree. You fear inconveniencing other people, so you prefer to adjust or cancel your plans. It’s hard for you to say no to a person or ask them to change the agreed terms.

As a result, you do things you don’t want to, get your priorities wrong, spend more time, and get less than you bargained for. And that’s only because you keep quiet instead of trying to change things.

7. You’re taking on extra responsibilities

You replace a colleague on your only day off; you go to the other side of town to meet a relative who could easily call a cab; you are constantly asked for help because they know you will not say no. You have to understand that everyone has responsibilities, and anything you take on beyond the agreed norm must be paid for or otherwise reimbursed.

You can’t work for other people all the time and expect that it won’t negatively affect you and your health. At the very least, you’re in danger of chronic stress and anxiety due to the sheer number of tasks, overwork, and insomnia.

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